Here's Why...

Since beginning college, I have found myself frequently asking, why I do a lot of the things that I do.

I have found that I often act out of habit, cultural norm/acceptance, or routine. 

The beauty of reflection, has therefore become ever real to me. 

Why, you ask? (good - you catch on quickly)

Because, if we are not careful,

routine, habit, and cultural norms will permeate into and define our spiritual lives

and before we know it,

little that we do will be a result of spirit-led communion with the Father.

Lately, I began to ask myself why I keep this blog going,

whether or not I am writing to myself.

Here is what I have determined:

I am committed to pouring my heart out in this way for two main reasons.

1. My Heavenly Father has called me out of darkness and into light. 

Clearly, the things I post here are not top secret or classified facts. 

Yes, they are personal, but it is one way I bring my struggles and tests to light.

There is freedom in light, in truth.

Satan's goal for Christians is isolation and to me, this is one way of breaking that bondage.

I am laying my heart out, being vulnerable.

Which leads me to reason number two...

2. I am committed to this because if even one person finds one glimmer of hope from one word in one post, every bit of it will be worth it. 

I journaled throughout high school, but I never would have thought to share those entries with anyone.

Why? (You're getting good : ] )

That would mean they would see that I'm not perfect...shocker.

Well, now I am here to tell you that I am not.

And if knowing that there is another young follower of Christ out there, wrestling with the flesh and struggling to die to myself daily, helps even one person, then there has been purpose in this blog.

I am learning the beauty of community, the beauty of sharing in our struggles, of being vulnerable.

So rather than keeping another journal all to myself, 

here are the open pages of my heart and life.

My story is still being written.

Day by day, I am watching as the Lord illuminates the path to which He has called me to walk.

It is painful, hazy, confusing, frustrating, captivating, and glorious all at the same time.

I do not have the answers, 

but I am free to admit that in Christ.

My security is not in having the answers,

but in He who answers when I call to Him.

I do not trust in the plan,

but The Planner.

Broken to beautiful, 

That is my heart's cry.

So in the good and the bad,

I am here to proclaim that my God is forever good, just, and righteous.

In Him I find life and freedom.

Anything good in me, is Him.

He is the same yesterday, today, and tomorrow.

And I yearn for my lifesong to sing His praises till the moment I see Him face to face,

and am able to embrace Him forevermore.

Until that day, 

I will struggle through this life,

with my eyes fixed on the prize.

I am a servant of the Lord

and here is my journey Home...